Have you ever been at a loss for words of hope to console someone who is going through tremendous pain or loss? I found myself in this situation earlier this summer when an unexpected tragedy struck our family.
My heart broke for the father as I stepped into the funeral home chapel. He sat quietly in the front row, the row always reserved for the family of the deceased. Wringing his hands and staring off into space, he seemed lost in the moment.
Beside him was his elderly mother, the only immediate family he had left in this world.
At the front of the chapel lay the still body of a young man, his 27-year-old son. I wondered how anyone could bear such loss. What words could ease even a fraction of this father’s pain?
When tragedy strikes again…and again
What made the moment even more devastating was the sad truth that this was not the first child he had buried. Nor the second. This was his third. Each loss had come on a separate, tragic occasion. What could he possibly hope for now?
He had once been married to my stepsister. Before their marriage, he had already endured the deaths of two young sons.
As if that weren’t enough, he had also lost his wife, my stepsister, just a few years earlier due to complications from surgery. With empathy, I tried to imagine the depth of his suffering, but my mind resisted. The thoughts were simply too painful to hold. While I had personally experienced the loss of parents and friends and endured the grief that comes along with those losses, I knew that paled in comparison to the death of children.
When gratitude and hope feel impossible
My Bible says to “Give thanks in all circumstances.” (I Thessalonians 5:18 NIV) I know the Bible is always right, and we are blessed when we obey the scripture’s commands. Yet I struggled with how anyone could give thanks to God when every child they love had been brutally taken from them? How could you be grateful for the breath in your lungs when grief makes even breathing feel unbearable? Could you even want to live? And how do you keep hope alive in a situation such as this?
When grief meets faith and faith leads to peace
As I wrestled with those questions, the Lord gently brought to mind the story of David. His son had become gravely ill, and David cried out to God both day and night. He fasted, he wept, he pleaded for the child’s life. But God did not answer that prayer in the way David hoped, and the boy died.
When the servants approached David with the devastating news, David rose, washed, applied lotions, and changed his clothes. Then he went into the house of the Lord and worshiped. After worshiping, he asked for food. His servants were stunned. “Why are you acting this way? While the child was alive, you fasted and wept, but now that he is dead, you get up and eat!” (2 Samuel 12:21 NIV)
David answered. “While the child was still alive, I fasted and wept. I thought ‘Who knows? The Lord may be gracious to me and let the child live.’ But now that he is dead, why should I go on fasting? Can I bring him back again? I will go to him, but he will not return to me.” (2 Samuel 12: 22-23 NIV)
While King David did not like the reality of his situation. He accepted it as God’s plan and found peace in the truth that he would be reunited with his son one day.
David’s hope – and ours- in the face of loss
I find this passage comforting on two levels. First, it assures us that all children go to heaven when they die. And second, it reminds us that we too can enter into that same eternal life. Because of his faith in God, David knew he would see his son again.
As believers today, our faith in Jesus Christ gives us that same beautiful promise. One day we will be reunited with our sons and daughters, our mothers and fathers, and all the saints who have gone before us. For those who put their trust in the Lord, death is never the final goodbye. Even in the darkest hour imaginable, there is hope.
Through David’s story, I realized that even on the most devastating day of our lives, we can still whisper, “Thank You, God, for the gift of eternal life.”
For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. – John 3:16
Gratitude brings hope
When have you experienced a time in your life when you had to painstakingly search your heart to find gratitude? What did the Lord reveal to you in that moment?
Did that revelation bring you more hope, peace and comfort?
For more on how gratitude can help during the storms of life, check out this post. https://teresaduke.blog/2026/07/31/finding-peace-among-lifes-storms/
